So anyway, I get on the elevator and before I knew what hit me, the door slammed shut and I found myself gasping for air. The elevator was saturated with someone's shitty, cheap perfume. It wasn't just perfume I was smelling, it was farts from old ladies, fast food from McDonalds (I could tell where it was from because it smelled like a mixture of horse meat and rat testicles--I think they're called Big Macs) and lawn mower exhaust (probably from the wood chipper they use on the prisoners in the basement). I couldn't breath it was so bad... I almost became completely asphyxiated.