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Several weeks ago I posted on my site that I would donate a portion of the
proceeds from my
store to the
Hurricane Katrina effort. Some of you doubted
me. A few of you even thought it was an outright fraud. I finally got
the results in, and I made a donation of $3,068
to the American Red Cross on September 22'nd.
This amount includes donations from several people who wanted to help out
strictly monetarily, as well as the contributions of friends, family, and
my own personal generosity.
If you think I'm being self-aggrandizing by calling my own donation "generous,"
this next statement is really going to piss you off: I think it's safe to
say that I am the greatest human being in the history of earth. I can't
believe how righteous I am. People have been asking me if I'll be going on
a book signing tour when my book comes out. I haven't decided yet, but I'll
definitely be going on a hand kissing tour:
To honor myself for this act of supreme benevolence, I will hereby not read nor reply to any email I receive until October 1, 2005 unless it includes the phrase "To his majesty, the honorable Maddox" in the subject line. I'm serious. If you want your email read, you must address me as "his majesty, the honorable Maddox" until October 1st.
1,008,530 people would be honored to have the privilege of kissing my hand.
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