My neighbor's kids were pissing me off, so I ate them.
I was sitting home the other day, staring at the wall when I heard my
neighbor's kids playing outside. I got pissed off and opened
my window and found a group of kids playing grab ass. I
started yelling at them and shaking my fists in the air.
The kids started to laugh, so I went inside to get my shovel.
When I came outside they started to run off, so I chased after them
with my shovel but I couldn't keep up and I almost had a
heart attack (which would have pissed me off even more, but at least if
I died, I'd have become an evil spirit that haunts children). The next
day I bought a bear trap and set it outside
my house. That evening when I was eating vegetarians, I heard the bear
trap clamp one of the kids. I ran outside and found my neighbor's
kid trapped in the clamp, so I took him inside and ate him.
224,671 losing it.